Fuck

Why do things HAPPEN to me? Or why do things happen INSIDE the perimeter of MY house? I knew it was a bad idea to invite the black sheep (aka Leonardo Delton, my stupid cousin) to my house along with my lawyer (aka black sheep's wife = black lamb). And this was all a way for me to actually ask him a favor, since his hospital is picking up, I thought I could use it as a good way to promote the Delton Industry further. Opportunities, opportunities, opportunities. So I tell Cat "Sweetheart, we're gonna have ourselves two annoying visitors, but this is for the sake of feeding our children". That's all the incentive my beautiful girl needs to welcome Carol and Leo.

In they come. As usually, Caroline is very beautifully dressed, impeccable as is to be expected from an elite Poodle (see Little Queen Bee in my Blog list to acquire further details). Leonardo was also looking good, though slim, he's feeding himself better now that he's got money and his inheritance back. I'm nodding, good looking people in my house, that's got to be good. Plus, I have to admit it, that Carol is one hot piece of ass, even though looking casual, with those tight jeans and long sleeved dark shirt, OUCH, baby you burn me (though never like my beautiful Caterina, now SHE has a body, you MELT me, baby). Okay, so there we are, we sit at the table, have a nice dinner. Caroline and Leo are quite entertaining people when they're not having sex like bunnies everywhere. We're talking about the family business, about random topics, and then it's time to relax in the living room.

And let me clear something out, something CRUCIAL to my story. Caroline is an ambitious creature, unscrupolous, high maintenance, selfish, and consequently she's hurt a lot of people. Sometimes, and these are the exception, with good intention. In general, she's a great lawyer, what do you expect? They are like snakes. Scary. Anyways, Caroline's redeeming feature is the love she has towards her friends, and her loyalty. In years of working with us, she's been our best investment, our key card in many negotiations. She would die for Kyle, Giovanni, Leo, Elena, Ashley, Veronique... (I don't think I'm in this group, she would probably kill me rather than protect me in occasion). My point being, she's a tough person to get through to, but once you're on HER LIST, then you'll have an eternal friend in her. Yeah. The rest of the population is not all that happy with her.

So I'm sitting there with them, serving some drinks after dinner, CHILLING, when suddenly I hear the door open.

My house is completely digitalized. I mean, there are codes and codes of safety protection programs covering my ass. Literally, only my eyes and Caterina's can open those doors...

... except for one other person....

My hacker pro sister, Lucille Marie Delton.

When she came in, I knew there was going to be trouble, I felt in my gut. And fuck, why was she dressed as Daisy Duke? Caterina was screaming "Whao, Lucy, you look hot!" which, of course, should not disturb me, because Caterina tries everything, and with much pride, so do I <3

That's not the point.

The point is that I saw a smirk in my sister that could only mean something had blown up in her brain and she was feeling dangerous. And when she's feeling dangerous, she gets reckless, and when she's reckless shit happens.

And this shit hit the ceiling.

One moment she was walking towards us, another second later she was pulling Carol by the hair and taking her outside to my terrace.

"COME ON, CAROLINE, you and I have a SCORE TO SETTLE."

I gawked and covered my face. Carol's face of shock was immediately replaced with one of anger. Oh Fuck No, the infamous Vasser eyes....

"Really, Lucille?" she scoffed and stood up, instantly gaining a karate stance.

"Oh fuck no." I murmured. Carol is a karate black belt with a terrible mood, and Lucille had received Interpol fighting training for years.

Leo was slightly gawking next to me. "Dude, I'll bet 50 dollars Lucy will be thrown into the pool first"

I turned to Leo. "Deal." and then watched in fascinated horror as they started throwing kicks and punches and biting and yelling, and things that women should only do inside a mud fight.

"Damn." I looked at Leo.

"What?"

"If it weren't my sister and my lawyer, I'd have SUCH a hard-on."

"It's my wife and cousin, so I have a hard-on."

And suddenly we had stopped talking altogether and just stared at the fight. Caroline had tied her hair up, and when she did, that meant serious business. She ran towards Lucille and literally jumping into the air performed one hell of a kick, landing in Lucy's stomach and slamming her into the wall. Fuck. This was getting extra serious.

"YOU WANNA PIECE OF ME, BIATCH, COME AND GET ME." Caroline roared like the sweet, little tomboy she was deep inside. And here you could see the family resemblance with Ashley, they were quite like primates.

Leo covered his nose. "Fuck, Eric, when she goes all tomboyish I get really turned on. It's like I really want to push her down and..."

"Hey, Mr. Gorilla, calm thy nerves, if you come in my carpet, I'll whip your ass, man."

Lucille got up, holding her stomach, but her anger was such that it moved her forward. It was something I'd never seen before. She literally flew towards the floor, rotated quickly and kicked Carol down. When she did, Lucy straddled her, pinning her down, she was going to punch Carol square in the face, when Carol luckily lifted her legs, turned and got Lucille off her. It was like watching supreme wrestling.

At this point I think Lucille understood she wouldn't win using her legs and hands, so she grabbed one random vase and threw it at Carol. "THAT IS FOR MARIE!" she screamed, and Carol fell to the floor; the vase missed her by inches.

This time, Lucille grabbed one garden shovel and threw it at her. "That's FOR NATHAN!" Carol rolled, she was covered in dirt by this time, bleeding in some places...

And then I saw it. Lucille grabbed my favorite barbeque knife and threw it at Carol. IF it had hit, my sister would have been trialed for first degree murder. Fuckity fuck. "AND THAT'S FOR ME! FOR WANTING TO BE ME, FOR FUCKING WITH ME, FOR TRYING TO IMITATE ME! FOR BLOODY UNDERESTIMATING ME!"

Leo blanched, because he saw Carol take the knife and throw it back at Lucille, and it also missed by slight inches. I wonder if this could be called legitimate defense?

Then they clashed, screaming at each other, yanking hair, pulling shirts apart, kicking, punching, slapping, rolling in the ground... years of unsaid feelings of anger poured out.

Finally, they were too tired. They just panted one in front of the other.

Carol cleared the blood dripping from her lip. "I'm sorry, LOUSY, for being THAT much better than you."

That's when Lucille took the last of her strength and she ran towards Carol with all her might and they both fell in a BIG splash into the pool. They continued swimming, and trying to drown each other, and biting....

Leo took his shirt off. "I'll take my wife, you take Lucy. Enough."

I nodded. We both threw ourselves into the pool and separated them, against their will.

10 minutes later, they were both wrapped around a towel, and they stared at each other with newfound respect.

Carol was the first to talk. "I did underestimate you." she said, narrowing her eyes slightly. "Well done, you actually took me on. Hm."

Lucille did not apologize. She merely nodded. "Needed to get that out of my system."

"Yeah, well, next time don't wait ten years to do so."

"And don't do it in my yard." I said

They shook hands as if finally achieving some sort of peace and then Lucy asked me to take her towards the door. I nodded, following her.

"Hey..." I said as she turned to leave. "What was this really about?" I blinked

"I never really settled my score with Caroline. I think it was too much poison to hold onto anymore. Since I'm doing the things I want to do, I started there. I wanted to prove that although I was tossed aside, I'm the better one." she smirked at me with a sparkle in her eye.

"Yeah, well, that was pretty brave of you. I thought you were cool taking her on like that."

She nodded and smiled. "It was fun." she winked at me, and left.

I shook my head. I would never completely understand women.